memories :)

it's a funny thing about memories. i've realized, that i somehow always seem to remember more the details of the happy moments of my life when compared to the times i felt sad, lonely or low. it's like the happy times have some sort of special super glue, their details just stick better. it ain't like the not-so-happy times get magically wiped off from my memory, it's just that what holds them to me isn't so powerful.

when i look back at my old photographs or read my diary, it's easier for me to connect to those moments where i can see myself smiling or where i can see the smile on my face when i was writing. there's a lot of times when i read something or look at a picture and can't for the life of me figure why or what got me that low. the question here is, does this mean something too? just like everything in life is innuendo, i'm sure there's something to this too.

His technology is absolutely amazing, isn't it? what feels like the end of the world to us at one point in time, a few days, weeks or years hence, we can't even remember. it's sort of like the people who walk into your life, just like the reasons, seasons, lifetime philosophy. if you go to see, it's all so well connected. everyone leaves you with memories - happy, sad, fun, crazy, morbid, hilarious, good and bad. but they all never stay.

as i write this, and i try and recall life, what replays in my mind are smiles, moments of happiness and the crazy things i've done with a lot of people. i remember the feeling i felt in all those moments. and i can feel those feelings, though not as strong as they were then, again. they help me realize just how lucky i am to have gone through moments like that, to have felt feelings like those. my reel, doesn't bring back those sad moments as vividly. i must've, in those moments of pain said that this was a feeling i would never forget or that i was so deeply hurt that it was going to stay with me for the rest of my life. now, there's not an iota of that sentiment in me.

i wonder if i'm lucky that i've experienced so much joy that it leaves no place for the sadness (ok....lucky, i am!) or if i just choose to look at it that way. what makes me think is the fact that whenever i've been low, and i go back to reading or flipping through my old photographs, they never fail to make me smile.

i can feel it through my tears, i can feel my eyes smile....
all i need to do, is go back for a while.
the feelings that i felt then, the things that i did,
make me want to sing and dance, like i did when i was a kid....
as i suddenly realize that i've grown up so much!
memories serve as my midas touch :)